guess that's life

Arghhh!! I cant do this!! ...I really cant.. One minute..I convince myself that its all over..the next.. I bloody hell know it aint over!!..and it gets worse when I run away from it!! I have a lot to deal right now..and I dont need this..I really dont..as it is..my studies is over the edge!!

I feel so lost..
Every move I make..seems to be wrong..
Every step I take..makes me fall..
I keep my eyes in the future..
But it's blank..

Sometimes I wonder..
Are you really hearing me..
Are you really wiping my tears??
Or are they only words...
to comfort and lie to myself..

Why do I feel I'm alone then..
Why do I feel so helpless..
Why do I still feel trapped??
When you have set me free..

I know everything happens for a reason..
But how long am I gonna cling on to that line??
How long will it take to find myself again..
How long are you gonna hide away from me??

I know I hurt you..
In every way I can..
I know you hurt deeply
because of it..
I know you're watching me write this..
You know everything,..even before I ask you..

I know I let it get in my way..
Without even stopping it..
I know I had a choice..
But I chose not to..

I know you won't leave me..
No matter how much I hurt you..

Why are you still with me??
Though I treat you like a trash..
Whenever I have the chance..

Why do I keep coming back..
And at the same time hurt you even more..

Why do I keep reminding my self..
Everything will work out fine..
Where by right..it wont..

Aren't you sick of it..?
Watching me got through it..
And then beg for forgiveness..
Right back at square one..

I do not know what else to write..

Sigh..
Guess that's life..