Wednesday, March 30, 2011

You can be the sweet tooth, i can be the laces! ..;p

Seriously, if there is one subject that could kill me, just by reading one sentence of it.. its surely WRITTEN DISCOURSE! ...I don't know how I survived after analyzing 40 sentences! ..but oh well, we all know I'm awesome, just like that...  gooo Juan! rock!! ..;p ;p

Lol, ..I need that "awesomeness".. after all that brain exercising! I am now having my self-applied break from writing, researching and referencing.. which brings me back to the main have no idea how much I hate WRITING now.. how now? should I switch to Marketing Communications or stick to Journalism? ..and yes my writing is getting from bad to verse.. oh and that reminds me, please don;t mind any grammar mistakes or spelling errors from the day I started blogging till I'm sure theres plenty!.. I'm bad at writing..;( ...

But then it was once my dream.. to inspire and touch people.. just by writing... sighh.. don't you just hate it when your so sure of something.. and then not anymore..there's something that makes you think twice and you have to make a decision.. whether you like it or not... and I'm bad in making decision alrite! ..I have a hard time deciding what to wear..or what to eat..of if I go for class or skip it! ..;p ;p

Hmmm.. So Samantha and me were obviously talking during Marketing and gosh I kinda missed her ..that I actually told her, "Sam I miss you la!" ..and we cracked up again! .lol...well basically its nice to talk to someone who feels really FEELS you...and yeap, the topic was about boys... ;p ;p

So let me spill..whats up with "guys?"! seriously.. one day the message you non-stop.. and the next... none! NONe! .ishh issh.. damm ego I suppose.. oh maybe, "I was waiting for you to message" ..typical.. give me another year.. I think I can list down all the possible "guyly" responses and attitude.. no offence ;p

Oh well, let me give you some advice, "It's better to loose your pride to the one you love, than to loose the one you love because of your pride!" ...ok those we'rent my words..some wise men said it..=)

hmm..if you're facing an aweful day! this..hehe

You can be the prince and I can be your princess
You can be the sweet tooth I can be the dentist
You can be the shoes and I can be the laces
You can be the heart that I spill on the pages

You can be the vodka and I can be the chaser
You can be the pencil and I can be the paper
You can be as cold as the winter weather
But I don't care as long as we're together

Ok that's not mine too..but its sooooo cute wei!! ..hehe..the lyrics are really cute and sweet.. you should go listen to the whole song.. its very nice and addictive.. Perfect Two by Auburn!

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Dear you

Ok I have a question.. a general question, to be more specific.. lol.. is it wrong to bring yourself closer to someone, just to forget someone else?? ...

And don't ask why, or who.. I was just curious..;p

I'm having that sttuuuppiidd damm feeling again.. ;( and its not nice at all! ..Like you have so much to say , but then you can't.. ;( ... So maybe I should really let it out anonymously..

Dear you,
....Honestly, I don't know how to start..and I've no idea what am I trying to say.. but well,  *drama a bit* ..;p ;p I know there's a lot I want to tell you..and a lot I wanna hear from you.. because I don't understand how the hell it works.. And I don't know why every step I take.. there's you! ..;( ..Sigh.. and the worse part is... Whenever there's a girl in that topic.. gosh, I get this dayymm "crying" feeling.. grr and yeap I soo hate myself for this.. Yes I've been trying my hardest to forget you, like totally.. and just when I thought I was over you..apparently I was in denial.. or so they say..and at every end of the road or every choice I make, you're there... oh yes, its daymm hard being a girl.. and its even harder being me..;( ..but yeah, I don't understand what in the world happen.. okay, I shall not review back the history.. and yes, its hard you know.. damm bloody hard! sighhhh..

Err..don't bother asking who is it.. because I wont tell ..;p ;p

Ok so let's get real..Why is it always me? ...Lord, yes I understand your love for me.. and I'm trying to love as much as you love me. but not anywhere near there.. and yes your giving me all these keep me strong.. I get your point.. but please let it go, would you?? ..You know I want to get over it...I've surrendered it so many so many timess! ..what else am I suppose to do? ..get a car to knock me so I loose my  memory? And at this point, I honestly, don't mind at all..

Oh lord, please help me with marketing! ..

In the dark night of March..

Oh btw..this is my 606TH POST!! i forgot to mentioned the 600th post.. so here's to 606! ..hehe.. wow, 600 in 3 years!! ..not that lifeless..;p ;p

Ohhh craapp..I lost my mood to blog again! yes about the girl and guy thing..but anyway I feel like writing something.. something from deep within..

In that dark night of March..
Where the moon shys away..
And the stars refuses to lighten the sky..

In that dark night of March
Where the rats find shelter..
And the birds flies back to their nest..

In the dark night of March..
Where sheets of the bed are warmed..
And the blanket scares the monsters away.. 

In the dark night of March..
Where the soul searches for answers..
And the heart is weary.

In that dark night of March..
Where the eyes refuses to close..
And the mind is running wild..

In the dark night of March..
Where she faces her fears with swords..
Where she finds comfort in the shields

In the dark night of March..
She climbs the horse of might
To defeat her worthless enemies..

In the dark night of March..
She tastes victory..
She wears the crown..

In the dark night of March..
She knows deep within..
That faith is all it takes..
Courage is all she had..
Hope is all she wants..

In the dark night of March..
She speaks to Jesus..
He listens..

In the dark night of March..
She leaves tomorrow..
In His hands..

Sunday, March 27, 2011

She's a fool..but He's amazing! =)

ahha.. we meet again? hehe...sorry sorry.. I'm just back to my blogging mood.. where whenever I see something that catches my attention.. it goes into my blog! ..XD

Hmm.. ok I was so buzy creating my facebook banner.. and I lost my mood on what I wanted to write.. it was something to do with guys, girls and everything else in between..;p ;p hehe

But anyway I have another testimony, while having earth hour..we had this so-called bonding session..with my cousins, my sister and me..=) My sister asked everyone questions..and we have to answer them truthfully.. hmm like who made you the happiest? who made you the angriest? who you think is the funniest? Who are you scared of?.. Who has hurt you the most..? .. and believe it or not.. I learned a lot from that 30 minutes "earth hour" ...  yes it brought back memories..and then you have to measure the degree to see who fits in the questions perfectly.. who fits in where.. oh well, I'm gonna go all emo..but you know what question I found it easiest? .."Who has hurt you the most?" hehehe..

Hmm..The memories are unbearable though..because you have once suppressed and buried them in a box..and promise to never re-open it.. but of cause, it has never worked, has it? No matter how much you try to forget these memories..or that someone..or that incident.. there is this one part and one moment that brings it all back to life.. and there you are again.. in the middle of no where.. thinking and thinking.. Honestly, I find "thinking" a dangerous past time nowadays..=)

And then came to the hardest part of this "who has made you the happiest?" ...err.. honestly, I went blank! blank.. and I said, "No one, i guess.. I kinda forgot, when the last I was actually happy.." ..hehehe ..yup, I'm a bit messed up..but wait.. I'm not done..=)

My sister, the psychologist.. she told something that I'm gonna treasure forever and ever..=) and if I don;t please do remind me of this post again alrite? ..;)

She said, "You're depressed.." ..

Lol.. yeah, tell me something new..

Ok here's what she really said.. "How can you say that?? You have Jesus with you!"

Wow, it hit me like a lightning..

And she continued..
"The truth is at the end of it all, You're going to be alone!! ..Nobody is going to be there for you.. and at that moment, you are still going to be happy..and smiling and laughing because Jesus loves you!!..He is there for you and He will never forsake you even to the end of time! ..Your safe! what else could you possibly need? Period"

I was like..."wooww-ed again!!"...why? because if you read my aged old posts.. I used to be her.. alright.. I use to blog endlessly about Him.. I used to say all those words.. and now??.. sighh the moment I let Him go..I'm depressed.. I really am! ..

The worst part is.. I knew it all along.. I damm well knew it all along.. and yeap, I was a fool..but you Lord, are amazing! ..=)

"Seeking you as a precious jewel..
Lord to give up I'd be a fool..
You are my all in all.."

Oh thank God for blogging... and thank you Lord for my sister!! and sister has grown so much wiser! ..XD

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Of assignments and holidays

Ok, since everyone is eager to know about the story of my "date" ...and because I refuse to be a nice and sweet I always am..;p ;p I'm gonna keep everyone I'm gonna say, "IT WAS GOOOODDD!!" XD ehhehehe.. oh yeap.. surely up for another!

Oh, and please do go and watch "Big Momma: Like father, like son.." ...I loved it! ..and the songs!! ..awesomeness! .heheh..

It's a saturday.. and yes I'm down with the assignments again.. and gosh, I'm already booked for my holidays k..=((

Booked with Pinky and Gentings..
Booked with Sam n Sudha.. definitely going out too..
Booked with Ishaa for movies..
Booked with the cousins, sis and family..
Promised Saha to go for KARAOKE... like about 2 weeks ago.. sigh
Meet Crystal for surelyyy..
Jacynta.. have to call her..

And my grandma from Johore asked me if I'm coming down again for this holidays.. siighh.. like I always do for every other holidays..

So how now?? ..=(

And gosh.. I have 3 more assignments left.. and I'm worried about how to spend my holidays?? ..Goodness Woman, get your priorities right!!! ..

Lol..and oh..

Because of you, I find it hard to trust not only me..
But everyone around me..
Because of you..
I'm afraid..

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Tak boleh tahan!

Yikesss.. tak boleh tahan!! ..tak boleh tahan!! really can't tahan.. ohh WEEKEND, please hurry?! ..weird, the weekdays pass slower than a tortoise..meaning the weekend is taking AGES to arrive!! ..and then the WEEKEND passes by in a FLASH.., "where in the world did the weekend go??" ..and honestly, you have no ideaa.. like BLANK.. sigh.. weird.. so weird..

I have Marketing, Popular culture, Business Communication and Written Discourse to be passed up NEXT WEEK! ..*dies* ..

Lol..and well I have to find a place to do my internship.. my sister was suggesting THE STAR.. since its right next to her office and we can have some sisterly bonding session going and coming from work... lol. ok I added the "sisterly bonding" part.. hehe.. I mean yes we do bond.. lbut we can't go an hour WITHOUT arguing.. uh huh.. that's how different we are.. inside and outside..=)

Ok ok..coming back to THE STAR.. I don't wanna work there..cause, cause its so GOVERNMENT ORIENTED.. lol.. like it support's the Government 100% .. why is that problem? because I'm sorry my writting is worth MUCH more than lies and manipulation.. ceehh waahh hehe.. I mean it will be a good experience.. hmm any suggestions??

Ok what else.. mom's away for the weekend.. she said she needs a break from the family.. she's going on a company trip for 4 days 3 KK!! ..ssiighh.. when is my break coming?? oh holidays, please do hurry.. I tak boleh tahan!! ..oh by the way.. damm UCSI for giving us freaking 9 MISERABLE days of holidays!! don't even call that a holiday k! ..its nonsense! ..grr

And its back to sem 2!! ohhh noo.. and we have MEDIA LAW AND ETHICS next sem.. *dies again* ..which is another HECTIC month.. but well, its amazing how fast time travels.. I'm almost finishing year 2 subjects.. and the next year 3.. and thats it?? THAT'S it.. good thing? bad thing? ..I don't know.. =(

Oh btw..I have a date
Hopefully it happens la..

Ok sorry for the whinning.. because really.. I tak boleh tahan..

Wednesday, March 23, 2011


Ok, I'm not in the mood for blogging.. but this song.. hmm.. this song is something.. Yes, a bit on the emo-ish side.. but its something..

My sister introduced it to me some time back...and she said, "gee Juan, this song is soo you.." cause I  argued with her.. but well, she was kinda right..

I remember years ago
Someone told me I should take
Caution when it comes to love
I did, I did

And you were strong and I was not
My illusion, my mistake
I was careless, I forgot
I did

And now when all is done
There is nothing to say
You have gone and so effortlessly
You have won
You can go ahead tell them

Tell them all I know now
Shout it from the roof tops
Write it on the sky line
All we had is gone now

Tell them I was happy
And my heart is broken
All my scars are open
Tell them what I hoped would be
Impossible, impossible
Impossible, impossible

Falling out of love is hard
Falling for betrayal is worst
Broken trust and broken hearts
I know, I know

Thinking all you need is there
Building faith on love and words
Empty promises will wear
I know, I know

And now when all is gone
There is nothing to say
And if you're done with embarrassing me
On your own you can go ahead tell them

Tell them all I know now
Shout it from the roof tops
Write it on the sky line
All we had is gone now

Tell them I was happy
And my heart is broken
All my scars are open
Tell them what I hoped would be
Impossible, impossible
Impossible, impossible
Impossible, impossible
Impossible, impossible!
Ooh impossible (yeah yeah)

I remember years ago
Someone told me I should take
Caution when it comes to love
I did

Oh well, I gtg! ..its a nice song.. awesome beat! go listen! =) by shontelle

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

The ride I wish I had

I didn't have anywhere else here i am again..=) they matter how far you run, your home is always where your heart is.. And no doubt, my heart has always been here.. so if you happen to read this, congratulations, you have my heart in your hands now.. ceeehhh waaahh

Lol.. Sorry, I have this sudden urge to be erm.. romantic! well now you don't wanna hear the rest.. you might have to hold my heart forever then..=)

Ok ok..I'll stop..

So lets skip about yesterday k.. it was a total.. hmm total I don't know.. I barely slept the whole night.. so yeah..

Anyway, I was so excited that I finished my assignments..and decided to dress up to I dig in my cupboard for something nice, something well attractive.. and nope, NOTHING!.. geee I need to go shopping..:( I need to go to the movies.. I need to sort out my study table.. I need to upload pictures in FB!.. I badly need a hug..I need someone to listen to me..I need to arrrgghh!! ..I need to do a lot of things! ..and the list will go on and better stop! anyway  I moved on to my sister's cupboard and I found something nice and put it on..yes, I looked gorgeous! ..XD hehehe

And of cause..of all the days.. it was raining non-stop today.. and yes I parked my orange-kancil and the far-end of KTM station and started walking.. almost tip-toeing.. so that I dont accidentally step on the pool of water by the roadside.. and "woossshh!!" .. there comes a car, speeding at the same time.. sharing the pool of water to my outfit.. and then came another car.. and another.. sighhh.. so much for dressing up la k! =(

And then when I reached the station.. something caught my eyes..I was standing right in front of this gorgeous, green and peach colour train with the title, "EASTERN ORIENTAL EXPRESS!"... I was stunt! ..Like I've never ever seen a train before.. I stared at it like an idiot with my mouth half open.. because that's how beautiful it is! ..

I actually took a picture of it, but I don't know how to transfer it to the PC..and thats how much I repel technology! But then I googled it..and I SAW it again!! ... waaahhh.. really its awesome.. here take a look!

Lol, yeah.. whats so special?? ..First take a look at the writing and the logo.. and compare it to EXPRESS SINARAN SELATAN.. lol what a name.. or KTM it self!!! ...and its like 3 times longer than KTM k! ..and as I peeped in the window, I saw this..

Ok I didnt really see that.. but I saw those tiny lamps!! ..I saw the curtains.. I saw the seats!! ... don't you think its gorgeous?? I was amazed.. so very amazed! ...

Then I finally know how is it like..when all the ladies especially from London, since they're the ones who conquered Malaysia.. in their huge hat, with gloves on their hands, and a grand gown, seating on this train.. on their way to marry the man they're engaged too! ..Like the ones you see in the movies.. Oh I love watching English movies of such! ..hehehe.. its breathtaking! ..and of cause somehow the guy will be poorer than her.. aahh typical..

So I allowed  my mind to lingered even longer.. like what if British still conquered Malaysia.. we will all be having this train..or something better compared to KTM! ..sighh

But well, everything happens for a

And really, this is so far the most superb transportation ever..


hheeeyyyy!! ..=))))

Ok I have 2 major assignments to pass up tomorrow.. so can't crap much.. but hey, you got to listen to this songgg...=)) if you have great taste like me, trust  me you'll love it..hehe.. ok ok..just go listen.. it wouldn't hurt..=)

Amazing- Janelle..

The morning cold and raining,
dark before the dawn could come..
How long in twilight waiting
longing for the rising sun..
ohoh ohoh Oh ooh

You came like crashing thunder
breaking through these walls of stone..
You came with wide eyed wonder
into all this great unknown..
ohoh ohoh Ohoooh Oohh

Hush now don't you be afraid
I promise you I'll always stay..
I'll never be that far away
I'm right here with you..

You're so amazing you shine like the stars..
You're so amazing the beauty you are..
You came blazing right into my heart..
You're so amazing you are...
You are..

You came from heaven shining
Breath of God still flows from you..
The beating heart inside me
Crumbled at this one so new..
ohoh ohoh Oooh ooohhh

No matter where or how far you wander
For a thousand years or longer..
I will always be there for you
Right here with you..

You're so amazing you shine like the stars
Find More lyrics at
You're so amazing the beauty you are
You came blazing right into my heart
You're so amazing you are...

I hope your tears are few and fast..
I hope your dreams come true at last..
I hope you find love that goes on and on and on and on and on..
I hope you wish on every star..
I hope you never fall too far..
I hope this world can see how wonderful you are..

You're so amazing you shine like the stars
You're so amazing the beauty you are
You came blazing right into my heart
You're so amazing...

You're so amazing you shine like the stars
You're so amazing the beauty you are
You came blazing right into my heart
You're so amazing you are...
You are

uh huh..its been playing on my mind..the  moment i heard it..=)

Monday, March 21, 2011

SUNDAY, the 20th

And I'm that little bit of hope..When my backs against the ropes..I can feel it..I'm the worlds greatest

Waaahh.. I think R. Kelly is probably the most AWESOMEE singer ALIVE! ..=)) hehe.. yessh, he's traditional and not the latest, apparently the world's into Bruno Mars, Justin Bieber or Jason Derulo.. oh well, they're okayy.. but R.Kelly.. is like WOOOOWWW! ..and yes I don't know what kinda life he's living.. but all I know his songs inspire me soo damm much...=) seriously you can just listen to over and over again...and never get bored!! ..and his voice.. oh well, please don't let me start.. I might take you to another world..and will never bring you back! ;p..uh huh.. that's how amazing and addictive his voice is..XD

Hmm.. so its a Sunday.. and yes I lost my voice again, while teaching today. I don;t know if its my students or me..but it gotten worse when I forgot to bring my water bottle..and I wasn't salivating at the same.. so I sounded like a spoilt radio..=( rosak! .. sighh

you know I never figured out why I started teaching.. but I knew I hated teaching last time..A few approached me but I declined for teaching is not really my we all know how nervous I am when it comes to presentation.. and of all people, the girl who wore the wrong contact lenses..gee how am I capable of teaching?? I can barely walk down the street without tripping or spilling something..sighh..

and yet here I am.. in front of 40 students.. shouting my lungs.. and enjoying every bit of it.. I'm not sure whatever I taught actually entered their heads..but then you feel this tiny bit of joy in you.. that is enough to make your whole day worth while.. You become a testimony to His works.. The feet to His body.. The witness to His love..and to bring the joy of Christ to children, is something that cannot be replaced with money or material.. you cannot buy this kinda joy. You have to feel them yourself..

But then I'm in dilemma.. like a big dilemma..after today and I don't wanna even think of it.. sighh.. One minute your sure.. and the next all the signs contradicts..
And this where you look up and say..

Father, your will be done .. not mine..

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Bye bye IT!!

"Lord I worship you because of who You are.."

Oh gosssshh.. I'm like soooo excited! ..Like so very excited..I think I could sleep with a smile on my face.. hehehe

Because IT, I'm officially done with you.. life forever and ever.. May you rest in peace.. and I meant that in the nicest possibly way..=)

And it couldn't be possible without my dear friend Alex... its nice to know, that someone is willing to have your back no matter how ridiculous or difficult the situation may seem... its nice to know that there is someone who will never let you down when you ask for help.. its nice to know to know that you can always turn to them, and that they will always be there for you.. its certainly nice that you're not in it by yourself..=)

But of cause, I'm sure there were times he felt like banging me on the head..for asking him at the eleventh hour.. or when I didn't get what his trying to say.. or when I sent him the wrong files.. or when I resend him back the wrong files.or the part where he asked for a small description and I send him a whole 2 paragraphs.. or for yesterday, where he practically stayed up till I'm not sure what time..and when I was bugging him on the phone for I can't open the files..for the silly-est reason cause I didn't unzip the files!! I'm sure he was ready to come all the way to kajang and cut me into, that is me we're talking about here. You're not surprised, I'm sure!! hehe but well, you got to excuse me and my I repelled technology long LONG time ago..;p

And sometimes I wonder, Lord what in the world did I do, to deserve such awesome friends in my life..??
oh and yes, I can't understand you .. first you leave me in a stage where I'm ready to jump off the cliff.. then you became the wind beneath the wings and thought me how to fly.. =)))

Yeap, You're one AWESOME GOD!

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Time to change..

Ok, I didn't know where else to go, so I came here.. ;)

There's a lot on my mind..and a lot more of stuffs that is waiting to be completed. But until I clear my mind, I can't do anything..;(

You know, I always felt a shiver whenever I hear the words, "tanah tumpahnya darahku.." ...yes, a line from Malaysia's National Anthem. And if it did occur that I have to die for this country.. believe me I will..because that's where my loyalty lies..;) It started right after watching JOAN OF ARC.. I was impressed and I admired the courage she had.. but now I'm not so sure anymore...I'm not sure about this country.. because honestly, this is a very beautiful place, but the amount of corrupted leaders, hypocrites, self-centered and racist homo sapiens.. makes it so unworthy.. and then some leader got the guts to say, "Don't ask what your country did for you, ask yourself what you did for  your country..??" you expect the citizens to do something, when they are being treated like STRANGERS.. in the place where we are born!

Because, now I'm even thinking of migrating to another place.. siighh.. I never really agreed on  migrating because I believe there is always a reason on why am I, where I am..but well, the mind changes depending on the situation..

Firstly, its the damm INTERLOK issue.. I mean it didn't really matter to me, for I never believed in the caste system.. and besides those are just merely words.. what matters is who you are, right now.. but the least one can do is be sensitive to other religion. If something is offending them.. then you as a leader, set-aside all the other voices, and do something!! ..You took an oath, not only to care for your OWN RACE.. but the whole COUNTRY!!.. and its a country of multi-races.. which means you have to cater for all.. we're not asking for gold or money or anything that belongs to you..we just want to be heard! and your not talking about one person.. its offending the whole Indian community..
The newspaper that showed the physical feature of Nabi Muhammad was immediately destroyed. No questions ask.. No demonstration needed. No meetings held. Just like that, the matter is solved. Why? because it offended the muslims.. Weird when other races face the similar situation.. the have to go through hell, and still nothing is done.. sigghhh.. and so where exactly do we stand in this country..??

Fine, its a good book you say, so be it.. why not edit that part a little.. and everybody will be happy again.. =).. but nope, what is politics, without its "politics" ... and the mentality of  most, 'my race deserves the best!!" ..the weird thing is, when you speak up, despite being a so-called democratic country.. they chase you away with tear gases.. and then blame you for causing a havoc/drama.. You may ask, why not send a memorandum and solve it in a rational way? Lol.. how much more memorandum can one send? ..sighhh

And so the one thing that really stirred me up, was when they seized the bibles.. and then they put so many conditions for its release.. No, the bible is not a communist book, its not a dangerous book, it does not hide drugs, alcohols or cigars, it doesn't preach about prostitution, human trafficking, murder, corruption or even lies.. Even if you don't believe that bible is the truth, but teaches about all the moral values in the world, about how you treat your fellow neighbours, about loving your enemy, about peace, about forgiveness..about love..sighh .. and yes, of all the books including porn books, harmful items, illegal stuffs in this world.. they choose to seize the bible because of one harmless, yet the most beautiful word that holds a deep meaning..that is able to bring the whole world together.. I don't what you call that.. but I call it total NONSENSE!! ..

Don't we have the same right? 
Didn't we sing the same song..?
Didn't we celebrate the same 31st August 1957?
Didn't our ancestors too poured out their blood for this country..??
Why must there be a damm quota system.. that is always divided into 3, unequally????
Why must we have less privileges in our very own country?
And till when do we have to be treated like a "third party" strangers?

Maybe the world is coming to an end.. Japan's trauma is never-ending.. Malaysia is getting from bad to worse..Middle east's "war" is on-going.. hmm

And my sister send me this email... and part of it says..

I asked God to spare me pain.
God said, "No..Suffering draws you apart from worldly cares and brings you closer to me.."

Perhaps, it is time.. Time to pray, Time to heal.. Time to change..

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Quit smiling..=((

Moral of today's story...

Don't ever, EVER smile at strangers... apparently, "smile makes the world a better place" ..only applies when the world is still safe and you can walk out of your house at 12a.m. or sight seeing without getting injured.. but now.. smiling at strangers is like a free invitation to your bed!! ...siighhh

But a big thanks to SHAUN LAZAROO.. he is truly heaven sent.. the perfect time, the perfect gender, the perfect words! ..=))

Or else.. shheesshh.. another drama..

Anyways, remember, don't ever EVER smile to strangers.. especially with a breath-taking smile like mine... they melt there and there.. and that's it! ..;p ;p hehehehe

Oh oh..and did I mention I absolutely love my friends?? oh yessshh I do! =))

Ok, a whole load of assignments on the way..

Got to go!

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Boys will be boys..;p

"We stand up and lift up our hands.. for the joy of the lord is our strength.."

wow.. exactly one week, the blog stayed silent..hmmm

Why? honestly, you don't wanna know what happened in the whole week.. dramas, dramas and more dramas. How I survived it? err.. it wasn't me.. yeap, it sure wasn't..because if you asked me how in the world I did it?? ..I have no idea..;( and if you ask me if I would do it again.. nooo waaayy.. ;) hehe

Anyway I have like 2 albums to upload and yes HFC youths are probably ready to chase me anytime with an axe for the SKYTREK pics..sigh.. but like I said, it was a CRAZEE WEEK! ..=( with IWD women's day.. which was probably the main reason of my dissappearance.. and yes FOM mid term yesterday.. how I did it? lol.. I'm just glad its OVER..

So anyway.. someone specially requested to be mentioned on my blog today.. He said that the visit stats will rise up.. lol.. well let see..;)

It's a he..;) and before I start, please don't get any wild imaginations.. like I said, I'm currently under a "no-feeling-diet" its safe.. lol

The name is Suren, ...from UCSI.. studying engineering, aged 21, stays in Subang.. relationship status, erm.. I'm not really I can't seem to read him..;)

Anyway incase you didn't know, the ones I mentioned on my blog, are the ones who manage to impress me..And yes, this dude here did impress me and made me go like "WOW" ..;p besides the part where he badly wanted to be on my blog and the part where he said, "Juan is AWESSSOMEE!" ..;p ;p hehe.. ok those weren't his exact words..but yeah, I'm sure he meant it..;p ;p

I don't think I've mentioned this before, but yes.. I hate talking.. yes the total opposite of my sis. Whenever I see someone I don;t really know that well, I'll be silently praying and wishing. "God don't let them see me.." and of cause, right after that.. somehow I will get their attention and have to fake a smile.. and think hard of what to talk.. lol.. its not really "anti-social" ..I mean I love talking, to the ones whom I really really LOVE talking.. where you can talk just about anything without feeling the "awkward" moment.. ;)

And this situation usually happens in the train.. lol..

Anyway back to Suren.. His probably the one guy whom I just met where I can really smile and don't need to fake one.. like you can't wait to hear what he has to say.. or you can't wait to tell him your stories.. hehe And then you can just talk on and on.. without any awkward-ness..

So I happen to meet him that Friday.. and somehow he was taking KTM to Nilai.. so we get to be in the same train.. and goodness.. the stories he was telling me, I swear, no humans in their right mind would have actually done oh come on.. you should have seen the look on my face.. when he told me what he did.. it was like I have died and burred in the mud.. and then came back to life.. to hear him finish it.. =) Yes, it was THAT horrible.. what did he do.. oh well, you should ask him yourself.. hehe.. its even funnier when he says it..=)

And it got me thinking. geee, boys will be boys.. no matter what. Oh I remember my high school moments.. where this bunch of boys will do whatever it takes to annoy the whole class.. oh you dont wanna know they did.. hmm.. but it was M.E.A.N! how mean? ..imagine walking in through the desks.. and then suddenly you tripped and fell face down, f.l.a.t.. on your their feet! ..grrr.. because the actually put out their legs while you were walking..and so you trip! ..and the whole class goes HA-HA-HA.. lol.. yes the girl was me.. sighhh... they torture girls then.. and still do.. lol.. boys will be boys.. hmm

And today was another hmm..rather unsual day.. spent the whole day in church.. andOh and you wanna know the results of last week?


lol..please dont mind the dark circles!! ..but check out the colour!! ..=((( ...yes I wore the wrong coloured contact lenses.. till anne shouted. .."Juan, I love the colours of your eyes.." .. siigghh..and freddie went all around the church announcing! fred! ..grr.. so yeah i was roaming around the church with blue and green eyes.. =( typical.

and meanwhile, IT is killing me! ...sighhh.. i tried to type the codes.. but nope, technology is soo not my thing! ..sighh.. Alex, if your reading this.... you soo got to help me! ..=(

Saturday, March 5, 2011

M!$$ m@rGr!+a ...;p


hehehe...guess who had their first MARGARITA today??

yeap, you guessed it! was A-MA-ZING!! ...well, I don't doubt the drink.. it carries my name..;p
But seriously, I loved it! ..=)

Ok moving on..


Do come and to UCSI for our EVOLUTION DANCE NIGHT!! ..its on the 8TH OF MARCH!! MPH HALL!

Oh no, FORTUNATELY you don;t get to see me embarrassing myself on that day.. ;p ;p..well, I'm just in charge of the deco, which of cause the HALL is going to look ok that's a lie.. honestly I;m like the most un-creative person ever.. but I learned something..that once you've agreed to take the responsibility.. no matter how sucky the situation is.. you just have to move on..=)

And so day and night, where I neglected my assignments, and Yoke Jeng was ready to murder me any moment..hehehe.. oh well, who likes last minute work?? ..I was at home..printing, cutting, pasting, molding.. all sorts of stuff I tell you.. and as dumb as I could be, I thought I could do it myself.. tht I didnt need any help..but of cause, I was wrong.. cause apparently, the dark circles are more visible nowadays..vivid proof of lack of sleep..grr hmm maybe I should start using make-up.. =)

and its gonna be a hectic week.. I don't know how I'm gonna survive it..and oh did I mention my presentation is also on the 8th of MARCH, morning? ..oh crap, somebody kill me.. I mean how are you to concentrate talking crap to a group of audience when there are lotsa things to be done??! ..its going to be a nightmare! it is normal usual day of presentation I'll be freaking out.. this is going to suicidal..

sighh.. but nevermind.. apparently after SKYTREK.. I feel like the most awesomest woman alive!! ..wooohooo!! .. like you can do anything you want..and get everything you desired!! ..and not forgetting the "margarita"!! I'm surely on top! ..;p ;p ...

Alrite, I needed that moment for a it can be a stress releaser! hehe come an support us for IWD!! priced at RM 10 (UCSI students) and RM 15 (NON-UCSIans)

nope, it doesn't require a date... so yes, your safe! ..;p

Friday, March 4, 2011

To be friends..

To be friends,
Honesty is the foundation..
Sincerity builds the wall..
Integrity becomes the roof..

To be friends..
You take out your masks..
You show your true colours..
You be who you are..

To be friends..
You say what's in your heart,,
You hold on to the truth..
You let the tears fall freely..

To be friends..
It means you stick through..
Thick or thin..
Laughters or tears..
Failures or success..

To be friends..
Is to trust them..
Even if the world doesn't..
For you know the truth..

To be friends..
Is to enjoy being with them..
And even more..
Enjoy being yourself..

To be friends..
does not hold any meaning..
once you have a purpose behind it..
once you have taken it for granted..
once you've broken the trust..

To be friends..
is to just be a friend..
Nothing more
Nothing less..

To be friends..
Its like the sun and moon..
Both very much different..
Yet they can't live without each other..

Hmm..why did I write this?? Because I value my friendship deeply.. and once its miused, its gone. Once trust is can't built it back.. and even if you did it will never be the same again..

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Hmm, its a mess.. so no title! ..=)

This is one of the moment, where I feel like bringing the whole house down! ..='(

Why?? ..well because honestly, I forgot when the last time I actually sat in front of the TV to watch a movie.. but of cause just when I started admiring Akshay Khanna's face on Zee TV, my mom has to switch the channel!! ..sigghh.. I mean, come on!! ..the girl just finished her 3500 words assignment, and a mid term and a presentation which she totally screwed up! ...siighh. she needs a break , you know.. oh well, maybe God thought I should blog about something..=)

so here it goes ..well, I was waiting for the bus today, and this chinese aunty in her 60's asked me whether the rapid 405 has left..which of cause I have no idea..I'm always on look for a GREY BUS that says "UCSI!" hehe.. and then she started talking to me about random tuffs ..=) she talked to me about her grandchildren and about how her children will scold her if they knew she was waiting for the bus instead of catching a cab, about her hospital journey.. and somehow she mentioned "old folks home.."

I was impressed with her children..the way they take care of their mom,,because its hard to find someone who is willing to take care of their parents in the world toady..err, oh trust me, I've visited old folks home, I;ve nursed and fed them in Sunway Medical Centre..I know their stories but then it got me thinking as well...

how can one be so heartless to sent their parents to the old folks home.. I mean its YOUR PARENTS!! may have 1001 problems .. and but its that same senile, old, sick parents that took care of you, changed your diapers, fed you milk, fetched you from school, put up with your nonsense, cried for you, got you married..

sighh..I mean yes, maybe they might have hurt you in one way or another.. but still, its your mother, we're talking about here, and if you can't take care of her when she needs you the most.. oh well, I'm no one to judge.. but, honestly, nobody deserved to treated like a stranger and worthless creatures, regardless of what their actions are..

Ok enough of lecture for today.. so besides my little talk with the chinese aunty.. I also screwed my presentation big time. oh well, thank God there aint no marks..=) ..but honestly, this is probably the most hectic semester EVER.. siighh..and did I also mention that UCSI made us travel in circles by changing 3 buses back-to-back today..?? yes, typical UCSI.. but it was like a little adventure.. imagine this girl in white dress and white shoes about 3 inches high..running up and down 3 busses, one after another, trying to grab a seat because the damm laptop weighs a ton..and here's the best all happened IN THE RAIN!! ..hehehe..I know, I love my life too! .hehe and yes, its one of the rare ocassion where you get to see me in dress! ..;p but honestly UCSI is just utterly dumb! ..=)

Hmm what else.. oh well, I've been having some unavoidable problem lately.. like how do you say to someone that , "hey you know what, I can't stand you 'tidak apa' attitude anymore.." ssiigghh.. why?? because I hate it when you take me for granted..just because you know I will do it. .. yes I will do it, but still.... siighh..

I have something else.. I have a lot actually.. but what was that one thing that just slipped of my mind?? hmmm

Oh yes, I'm starting to think I'm well, a bit abnormal.. why? because I officially have no interest to be in a relationship now.. nope, I don't.. its like the heart is NUMB, the feelings are plain.. the doors are closed, the walls are up..

Or maybe, hhmm.. I think I've said much today! ..

Later then..

Oh and I think R;Kelly has got an AWESOME voice!!