Sunday, January 30, 2011

Because sometimes you got to have a lil faith

No I don't really wanna talk about what happen today. The mind was all over the place..

Well, you strive to be perfect.. the perfect daughter..but it's simple not enough.. its never enough.. and the weird thing is, its the best already and if you push yourself a lil more, you'd have no choice but to probably jump over the cliff!! ..=(( the perfect friend.. sighh.. which never did happen and never will... cause something else always get's in the way.. =(( the perfect sister.. haizz... its the other way you know.. I have the perfect sister.. but well let's just not get in there..=(( the perfect girlfriend?? ...hmmm... oh dear, I think I really scare people off.. =(( ..The perfect child to God?? ..=(( And thats the one that I failed the mostt!! ..sssiiighhh...

And since I need to somehow find myself again by 10.30am tomorrow morning as I will be facing 54 rascals.. lol ok, they're not that bad.. A lil, but can la..=)) ..It's the first time in this year I'm gonna teach.. and I'm gonna talk about angels..=))

Hmm.. how I wish someone would have told me about angels, when I was 11..I mean yes, I did knew about them..but no one told me who exactly they were, what they did, where are they present?? ..sighh at least I wouldn't be feeling this depressed at the age of 21..=((

Because I just googled the Catholic website about angels and the mass.. and I went like WOW!! =)) so maybe you dont believe in angels.. oh, well how is it that you believe in the one no man has seen or can see?? ..It's simply called faith! ..For blessed are those who does not see and yet believe..=)

But I still don't feel that good.. argh.. nevermind we shall not talk about it.. AALL IZZ WELL!!

Yes its me again..
The one who probably comes to you only when she needs you..=(
Well, yes I kinda need you the right now..
Weird, we never knew that YOU'RE the only one we need.. when YOU'RE the only one we have.. sighhh

Well I did try coming to you.. It didnt work..
But then I finally realized, 
That one needs to seek the Lord with all your heart, mind and soul..
Then can you find him..
Guess I searched you with my mind only.. not my heart or soul..
Apparently at the moment it was really, kinda messed up! ..
Yes my fault, cause if I actually surrendered them to you earlier..
I wouldn't be in such a mess right now! =((

Anyway, you know what happen today.. 
You know everything.. even my thoughts and hers..
But well, you know what's best..
You know what's right..
So help me then..
To know what's right..and do it..
Help her too, guide her and be with her..
For she means a lot to me..
And yes, I love her so very much!!

Oh oh, and please speak through me.. when I speak to YOUR children about you, tomorrow..
For you know, I go clueless, blank and very blurr in just a second! =)

One more thing... you know about that "thing".. I talked to you about earlier.. please do something about it! ..K thanks for listening! ..oh oh and as you promised, bless all my angels and send me more!! and thanks a lot for them! =))

p/s .. it feels a lot better, when you write your prayers, rather than saying it out laud.. becomes my mind  gets distracted like so so easily! ..This works.. you should try it too.. sometimes!

Ok its 2.50 a.m.. yikesss.. and I wonder how in the world I got into teaching ..sighhh.. fail la! ..lets hope and pray that I can get actually get up when the alarm rings..rather than snoozing it over and over..till I realize. "oooppss I,m late again!!"

Saturday, January 29, 2011

And when everything falls apart..

 So what do you do when everything else falls apart? hmm having a bad day? Need someone to talk too? ..Feeling so lost and lonely all of a sudden.. Wanna hear some comforting words, thats worth your time?? And sometimes when the heart is a lil secretive.. and is determined to keep everything to itself.. perhaps, its time to listen.. to be still and simply listen..

Before you might wanna say these words to someone whom you think.. doesn't care about you anymore.. and yes, the one who is by your side.. and who watches upon you..=)

I know I need you..
I need to love you
I love to see you..
Its been so long..

I long to feel you
I feel this need for you..
I need to hear you..
Is that so wrong??

Now you pull me near you..
When we're close I fear you..
Still I'm afraid to tell you..
All that I've done..

Are you done forgiving?
Can you look past my pretending?
Lord, I'm so tired of defending what I've become..
What have I become..

I hear you say, 
"My love is over, 
Its underneath, its inside its in between.."

Honestly, thats NOT what He's trying to say.. Hmm feel your heart beat.. feel your breath.. and be still and listen.. just listen.. =)

The times you doubt me..when you can't feel..
The times you question, "Is this for real?"..
The times you're broken,
The times that you mend..
The times you hate me..
And the times that you bend..

These times you're healing..when your heart breaks..
The times that you feel like you've fallen from grace..
The times you're hurting..
The times that you heal..
The times you go hungry and are tempted to steal..

In times of confusion,
In chaos and pain..
I'm there in the sorrow, under the weight of the shame..
I'm there through your heart break..
I'm there in the storm..
My love I will keep you by my power alone..

I don't care where you've fallen..
Where you have been..
I'l never forsake you..
My love never ends..
It never ends..

Nope it doesnt end..even of the world ends..=)

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Because its ok to feel completely human..

Hello.. I'm so very the happy today! ..hehehe.. nope, its not because I finally got my ribena, ...siighhhh.. my mom decided to not give in to my whining and pestering...and I'm beginning to think that I might be adopted!..=(( ;p;p hmmm but well this happiness is because pinky got me M&M's!!! ..hehehe ;p ;p ...

Hmm..ok let's be serious..and talk more about stuffs that actually shows that this blog belongs to a 21 year old girl.. rather than a 5 year old girl..hmm *shhheesshh.. did I just type 21??** ..Ohhh nooo...=((  she;s 21 already!! but seriously, I don't look like one..and neither do I feel like one... haaiizzz..

Anyway, I stumbled upon Alvin Teoh's note..He is like Martin Jalleh and Mervyn.. the one who goes around Malaysia, giving talks and inspiring youths! ..=) and when I read his note I went  like "WOW!!"..=) because he made me realized that its ok to feel totally human..=) ..Its ok to feel like you don't like who you are now.. It's ok to feel far away from God and feel guilty about it.. its ok to feel like quitting in whatever your doing.. its ok to feel that you've been a bad child to your parents..or a bad parent to your children.. its ok to fall..its ok to cry.. its ok to feel completely human.. =))

Oh oh..and its ok to feel completely emo-sified and its really ok to write about your frustration, anger, or how hurt are you.. Others may think that you are asking for self-pity.. but this is how certain people deal with it.. rather than jumping off the 26th floor or hanging on the ceiling or drinking weed grass poison.. seriously, this way is so much better..=)

So yesh.. if your reading this.. and your feeling completely lost and so alone and so well not-so-good.. really, its alright..=) ..and remember, things are going to get better! Have faith!

Anyway, back to what happen today.. Nisha, Pinky and me..had a rather unusual+exciting+informative lunch date!! ...We were so buzy talking and talking and suddenly Nisha said, "comes lets go to genting!!..its like another 2 more years.. and after this..we wont be seeing each other so often anymore!!" ...And then it hit me there and there! ...gosshh.. its the 2nd year already.. where and how did the first year pass by sooo fast??! ..sighhh.. and the next thing we will all be getting married and having kids.. Ok the "we" obviously didn't really include me..I meant my friends..=)

Sighh...and yes we were suppose to make a day trip to genting.. but well my dearest Pinky is having some unavoidable circumstances we're going to settle it with a movie instead! ..=) oh oh..and back to M&M ... wow, seriously its been awhile since someone touched me with and make me go "AWWWHHH!!" ..heheh.. Pinky actually remembered to get me my m&m's which I told her jokingly to get it for me and of cause I totally forgot about it also! ..and then today she dragged all of us to 7/11 ...and bought me M&M's!! ...XD ..hehe.. yes, it may sound normal for you.. but for me.. perhaps its what you call friends..=) though it was only m&m's..but really, its the thought that counts! ..

And I've got no idea what I did to deserve such lovely friends! ..=) XOXOXO!

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

She wants RIBENAAAA!!

I think I've been blogging so much.. that now I'm having a writer's block! wanna know what it is? ..Do that a look at sukhbir's blog!! ..=)

Anyway..I want my Ribena!!! Like seriously.. I begged and pleaded my mom to make for me..for she gave the, "are-you-serious?" kinda look...I mean though I know I can make it myself.. sighhhh.. but it taste's nothing like when your mom makes it.. it is filled with extra love and EXTRA SUGAR!! ...;p ;p ;p ...hehehe ok fine, the point is I WANT MY RRIIBBEENNAA!!

I remember when I was in kindergarten, Ribena was like the world's awesome-est drink!!! ...and Padle-pop was everyone's favorite!! ...siigghhh... and it still tastes sooo gooodddd!! . and they have this thing new thing with apple + ribena... it's so-so only eh! ..heheheheh

Hmm.. oh oh..and I was also craving for NESTUM!!! ...Don't ask me why.. its just all of a sudden, you have this craving for certain food. NESTUM is just soo yummy.. my mom didnt feed me RUSK when I was a kid.. so I didn't really get the gist of it..but NESTUM! ..yessss baby! ..hehe.. Let's not get to chocolates.. I can just die any moment..;p

And my mom is leaving to Langkawi this weekend.. I begged her again to get me 5 packetS of hershey's kisses!! ...woowww.. now it self my mouth salivating d! ..hehehe ..but seriously, you can just die with kisses! ..again.

The thing is.. I'm having hunger fever. Yes, thats a new found disease by me. Its like every hour you need something to munch..though you just had OLD TOWN'S Nasi Lemak Special.. you need more!! ..sigh.. I think by the end of this semester...I'd be looking like a potato sackk! ..

sigh sorry for sharing with you my depression in hunger and yes this post is totally lame.. but its true. I'm hungry and I WANT MY RIBENA!!


Tumblr reads mind!

There.. that was photocopied exactly from my mind..somehow tumblr read minds.. =)

Good nite!

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Complaint and complaint!

Ok someone just got into my nerves..=((

Because, you're my friend.. and I treat you as one.. and well I'm porbably the bestest friend you'll ever get.. *perasan abit~~* ;p ;p hehe but seriously that doesnt mean you can cross the limit.. sighhh.. and I truly value true and sincere friendship.. I'll cherish it till forever.. but then. grrr this is too much! like wayy too much.. sighh.. I'm not the type who says it to your face.. but this is like soo very unexpected!

Anyway.. sorry for that one paragrapgh.. I just needed to let it out somewhere..

hmm..and now I lost my mood on what I wanted to write..:S

Hmm anyway have you ever taken a look at the sky?! Seriously its sooo magically beautiful.. Like someone drew it..every shapes and sizes fits in perfectly.. and the colour.. especially when the sun rises..or sets.. its simply breataking!! ...and the moment its about the rain.. it paints the perfect picture of sadness, guilt and darkness.

And so the rain pours.. like nobody's business! ..Yes I love the rain.. but when your bag is heavy and your jeans is sweeping the floor and you chose to wear these gorgeous new shoes..and you happen to wear this white blouse..thats exactly when you say, "Lord, why do you always shower your blessings at the wrong time??!!"

Hehehe.. but then again..when it doesn't rain.. we curse the hot whether.. "It's sooo stuffy! We all need some ice!" ..and when it rains.. we wish otherwise..

Weird eh? ..Yes, we humans.. we complaint and complaint and complaint.. and we are never satisfied! .. We have something.. and we expect more! ..Higher pay, air-conditioned room, gold-dyed hair, one more car. Yes I complaint too! Like a lot.. especially about KTM! ..=)

And still, KTM was partly responsible for my education.. seriously! ..=)

A wise person once said,
 Stop complaining, start appreciating.. and you will see how beautiful your life is..

Take a wild guess who is that wise person! ...hehehe yes yes.. meee!! ..

Ok lame..

Need to get back to my assignments! ..

Monday, January 24, 2011

Something wrong

Ok something is wrong! ..Hmm.. and no its not because I have ULCER'S near my throat, on my tongue.. which is robbing away my tasted buds..hence I can't enjoy my food as everything is sooo tasteless..and making me sound like a grumpy old lady!!!

Its something else..
Something I'd rather not tell..
Something I'll take with me
Till I reach 6 feet underground..

Its something hmm..
Its something you will never guess..
Something I kinda shed tears..
Something that left me sleepless..
Something which I've no idea whether its my fault or not..
Something I wish to say it too..
But I can't..

Then I say to myself.. "Nevermind Juan, there's a reason.. there's always a reason!" ..

Because seriously, that's the best thing you can say to yourself. When everything else falls apart..there has to be a reason! ..=)

Sunday, January 23, 2011

There's this thing about loving unconditionally..

"Nearer here.. may our life tell your story.."

I learned something today. Its like you know it all this while.. but you never took account of it. You know its there..but you got blinded.. and that you never realized it till someone says it right to your face. Now that you've finally gotten it all figured, where do you go from here??..

Hmm I learned about division. God came for all, but then we human divided Him. We disagree with the church and start our own, by right the truth is right there.. in front of you. The world is divided. Casts, wealth, race, religion. Even the country. Malaysia is a very good example. Your family is divided. Sisters against sisters. Mother-in-law against daughter-in-law.. hmm.. and yes within you, there is division too. The brokenness, the unhealed wounds is what keeping you away from God..=)

I also leaned ...that when you love, love unconditionally.. Yes, love everyone unconditionally. Because that is the same love given to us. And now, if you keep that love to yourself, what is the point then? ..If you love only those who love you and not your enemy, what good is there? ..what difference does it make?.. It defeats the purpose of LOVE. =)

Hmm.. because He asked for nothing in return. He didn't say this..

  • I'll only love you if you go to church
  • I'll only love you if you help the poor
  • I'll only love you if you stop drinking and smoking
  • I'll only love you if you blog about me..
  • I'll only love you if you stop gossiping..
  • I'll only love you if you start praying..
  • I'll only love you if you stop hurting me and keeping me away from your life.
Nope.. he didn't. "IF" didn't exist in His dictionary. No conditions laid. No rules applied. He gave everything, His life included. =) ... He sees you, just as you are... He sees you living your life,  and He loves you just the same, no matter how much you hate him.. He loves you just the same!

Sadly, we tend to apply conditions. Hmm.. when we love, there's always condition. Well, I have applied conditions. It hard.. to love someone who actually hurt you and cheated on you. It's even harder to forgive. It hard to care for someone who tore your life apart and broke your heart. If you had a chance, you wished you never met them.

Yes its hard, but not impossible, for it has been done before!

And that's exactly when division occurs. That's when there's war in the world. In countries, in families and even within yourself.

I learned something else too today.. that until you can learn to love someone unconditionally, you will never find peace within you. =)

May your life.. the way you live, the way you love others, the way you forgive, the way you show the world that you're different.. may this tell His story..=)

Friday, January 21, 2011

The story of the broken sandals..

Sighhh.. so you wanna hear what happen today? hehe.. Actually it is not that much of a story.. but I'm known for my exaggeration and well a little on the "dramatic" do bare with me..=)

It all started like this...

Once upon a time.. in the land far far away, called KAJANG, which I presume many of you dislike it, nevertheless its probably the best place ever existed in my map! ..;p ;p ..yes I know, such a sad child eh? anyway back to my story.. there lives this gorgeous, awesome girl who has got no idea what is going in the world.. OK *scratch that*!! ..Who thinks that in this world of lies, there must be some truth left! ..hmm thats better..=)

Ok, you know what? ..I'm running out of words, and there's this awesome movie that's gonna start.. so lets make it short!

So yes, there I was attending my Fundamentals of Marketing class with Sam, Sudha, and Adrian.. And nope I forgot everything I learned today, but I remembered the jokes we cracked and the laugher we had..=)

After that I had written discourse with pinky, and as usual, Pinky decided to skip class again! ..hmmph! ..I was getting out from the lift..and somehow my sandals "magically" broke! .. I was like, "Oh no, this is not happening!!" ..grrr! ..But of cause, it happened...=(( ..It really did.. sighh..

I was sitting with Yamunah. And we were both cracking our head on how to fix mysandals. She was really sweet! =) I tried calling pinky like about 1000 times, but of cause that "nut" was still on bed!! ..grrr.. So I started asking the whole class for sellotape.. and nope, none of them had any.. hmmm.. I was desperate that to the extend, I started thinking of sticking my dentyne "chewing gum" to stick my sandals back together! siighhh.. Don't blame the girl.. she's still learning..=)

So I decided to msg Sudha, since she was the only one free.. And after numerous of msges either going to the cobbler or getting new slippers, Evin, my new found friend also my life saver borrowed me her slippers! ..And trust me, that message was like a breath of fresh air! ...

Seriously, the things I go through in life, sometimes I doubt if I was even destined to be created in the world..its like I escaped from another planet or something.. hmmm.. But I thank God, that my sandals didn't break when I was on a date! ..=) And to those who went through the trouble with me.. thanks a MILLION! ..=))

Moving on, I'm dancing again! .. yes, I'm kinda insane to have agreed to it but Sudha asked me so sweetly that it is so impossible to say NO! ..hmmph.. anyway so there's Sam, Sudha, Vashina, Evin, Kash, Jag, Sukhbir, and Riyad. We're kinda in need of another guy..who is suppose to be my partner.. So if you think you can dance, and cute, and single, and 6 pack and preferably 6 foot,happens to have a heart..can speak french.. you can sign up for the application..=)) ..LOL.. ok I'm just joking! Apparently that "guy" doesnt exist.. so application under construction.. again! ;p ;p

Goodness, I've got no idea what I just crapped.. anyway speaking of guys.. my mom asked me some interesting questions today..

Mom: Juan, how come there's no one special in your life.. 
Juan: Well ma, you simply have to remind me la now huh..
Mom: Sure there must be someone that you like.. 
Juan: hmm..I did.. I really did.. but well its not meant to be, I guess..
Mom: Do you want me to find someone??
Juan: Goodness gracious...since when you started running the match making business?..I'm pretty sure I'm capable of finding one..=)
Mom: ...Just don't be so choosy k! ..
Juan: .....

Oh and by the way.. I got a hair cut! It was simply too long..and depressing lol Yes the hair is shorter, with frinch, layered. I like it!

So the moral of the story.. hmmm.. that just because your sandals broke, its not the end of the world.. =)

Thursday, January 20, 2011


O Lord hear my pray..
As I lift my voice and say..
I need you Lord today..
I need you right away..

Somebody's in despair..
Somebody feels like no one cares..
I know you'll make a way.. 
Yes Lord, You'll make way..

Somebody's crying O Lord.. Kumbaya..
Somebody's praying O Lord.. Kumbayaa..

Hmmm..because sometimes you simply got learn to not worry.. and learn to let it go to the ones who knows you best!

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Life's mysterious journey

"I'm starting to trip..I'm losing my grip and I'm in this thing alone.."

Gosh.. my mom needs a break. Seriously.. sigh.. She should give herself some break and give us some break too! hehe

Anyway like I said, no more long emo-posts..So here's some random facts about life..=)
  • Your alarm decided to not miss the train but somehow you made it for class..10 minutes earlier than the usual time..=)
  • You park your car at the end of the road..and walk all the way to the station..but then you see there's more parking space in the front.. and you say to yourself.. "Yikes! I better come to the front next time.." ..So the next day, you semangtly drive your striking orange Kancil to the front..and daannggg.. "every parking space is filled!!" ...grrr.. and the next day, you park at the end again.. and yeap, there's a lot of empty spaces in front.. =)
  • You decided to "dress" up like a girl to uni today...with skirts and heels.. and well, you then accidently stepped on a pool of muddy water..=)
  • Oh..and one more thing.. You wear your typical teen look, with a baggy shirt and a faded jeans, with your hair tied up in a horse tail, with an unpowdered, oily face and with a dry lips.. and well of all bump into a hawwtt guy!! ..=)
  • You're running late for class.. and well so does KTM and every other public gets delayed let's say about 30 mins??!  But when you're super duper early.. everything else is on time.. hmm.. =)
  • You're extremely happy cause you arrived early for class, at last..and all energetic to learn about the boring-est subject ever existed, Written Discourse..and guess what?? ..Class cancelled!! ..=)
  • You decided to leave your umbrella behind..cause your bag is a lil too heavy.. and well it rains like it never rained before! ..=)
  • You're sooooo semangat to blog about something important..and just one single message from someone.. leaves your mind blank..and your heart restless.. 
Weird huh? ..The journey life brings us.. Weirds things happen at weird times.. Unexpected things happen and unexpected times.. Yet thats what makes life so beautiful. Not knowing what will happen when.. Or who will you meet... Keeps you waiting and hoping ..walllaaaa.. SURPRISE!! ..hehe.. Its all a mystery..  The best part of life is that..everything, EVERYTHING happens for a reason... Once you choose to believe it, then will you appreciate and unravel life's  mysterious journey..=)

Oh oh before I leave..I use to be quite a fan of Avril Lavigne.. lol.. yes I can't believe it either. And yes, her songs are more on the emo side.. like this..hehehe

Sometimes I get so weird..
I even freak myself out..
I laugh myself to sleep..
It's my lullaby..
Sometimes I drive so fast..
Just to feel the danger..
I wanna scream
It makes me feel alive

Is it enough to love?
Is it enough to breathe?
Somebody rip my heart out
And leave me here to bleed
Is it enough to die?
Somebody save my life
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

The weird species..;p

Ok, no more long stories.. lol.. seriously.. I was viewing my blog from UCSI comp lab.. and I was like.. geee.. I wrote all that?? ..How lifeless..;p

So lets KISS today!! ..hehehe..chill chill, my "kiss" is way to priceless to posted here! ..hehehe it means "Keep it short and sweet..!!" ..;p ;p or in US they say "Keep it short, stupid!!" ..hhehe

So let's talk about something we all have so-many-questions about..hehe..yeap that one miserable, complicated, interesting species called boys.. hmm, yes its gonna be a bit biased.. but well don't leave yet.. you might actually agree with me on this..

And this is coming from my very own observation. Not to pint-point at anyone. Not to justify their actions. Not to prove that I'm right. No..this is merely, from the point of a girl who's trying to understand this species called "guys"

  • Honestly, sweet talking is cheap. Like real cheap!! ..I mean come on.. what are you trying to prove? That you have the most gf's around?? Or are you simply trying to get under the sheaths with her?? ..hmm.. Seriously, sweet talking is cheap. Grow up please.. be a man..=)
  • So what is this nonsense about proposing through MSN or SMS?? ..So you like her..and don't you think she's worth much more than just a sentence through the phone? Yes, I'm talking about taking her out, looking into her eyes,holding her hand..and there..aint that sweet!! ...=))) ..The worst she would say is no...which is surely her lost, for I don't see guys like this nowadays.. hmmm..
  • Again, what is the hurry about being in a relationship??!! you just met her 2 days ago, and yes you have butterflies in your stomach.. but honestly, butterflies doesnt really last long..hmm.. once there is a storm, they die off.. So it takes time for the butterflies to build some shade.. to protect themselves and be strong!! ...It takes time.. seriously. If you want now and forever, till death do us apart, it takes time..=)
  • Hmm, this might be common.. One minute they're all over you..and the next ..puuff!! ..they disappear.. like a kit you see, now you don't.. and then they leave the girls wondering.. oh yeap.. its the girls fault I should say.. because the rule is, don't get attached too fast! ..=) ..but well why keep the girl falling for you, when you don't intend to catch her? ..=)
  • So if she's your girlfriend, what gives you the right to tell her who her friends should be? or what she should wear..or not?? .. She doesn't really need second parents, you know. One is good enough! ... because love comes with trust. Without trust, love goes down the drain..=)
  • If you really like her.. you will wait.. If she's worth the wait, you will.. And if she likes you me, she will make it worth it..
So the moral of the story is... just be who you are.. and let love lead the way. If its meant to be. It will. Or else.. something better is on the way! ..

Monday, January 17, 2011

Find some time for laughter..

Ahemm!! ...=)) was your day as unusually unpredictable as mine? ...or just another day like any other??

hehehe...a very funny thing happen today.. like seriously..hmm where shall I start.. erm alrite, since the Kancil is left all alone at home like an orphan, I'm kinda in charge of it..hehe so every morning I'll drive it to KTM, park it there.. and after class, bring it back..

So today I reached kajang at about 4.30pm.. and decided to wait for my mom.. which will be like another hour.. or else poor mom have to take the bus back home..hmm So there was I, all alone in the car, under the hot sun.. pondering about how extraordinary life could something that seemed so perfect be so very wrong?? ..sighhh..and of cause, all the emo-songs started playing....

Anyway let's leave my depressed, exciting life aside first.. And then after a few minutes my eye lids was getting heavier and soo i fell asleep..hoping to get my intoxicating kiss from the so-called prince charming on his white horse...hehehe ;p to get the gist of what it feels like to be "sleeping beauty" ...heheh ;p ;p ... I couldn't be bothered about all those who peaked into my car wondering "did she pass out or something??"

Anyway when my mom arrived, I was so happy that I my heart leaped for joy.. Couldn't wait to get back home and jump on my dear bed, cover myself beneath the blanket and warm the sheets.. have been missing it all day long!! ..And of cause God chose the right moment to shower his love upon me..cause at that exact moment, the dear kancil..decided to NOT START!! ..sigh..

Quickly called my dad, he asked to wait for 30  mins and then start again..and I was like, "You're kidding right.." ..but of cause, whatever I wished never came yeah..there was I again.. thank God mom was there..or else, sighhh.. there might be another emo post for today..hehehe.. and so we were caught with some mother, daughter conversation.. and goodness my mom is naughty k! ..Like really dont wanna know the things she does to annoy my dad! ..hehehe ;p

Anyway, mom thought she was wasting her time there..hence she took the bus home to cook dinner..and asked me to wait till my dad comes to get the car started..which was like another 30 mins.. and yeap the clock showed 6.30pm.. and there goes my 2 hours..just like that.. hmmm

So dad arrived..and nope, the car was soooo stubborn! It still didnt start! ..So I waited with him..for another 15 mins...till he told me to take the bus and go home.. And so I waited for the bus for another 15 mins.. and the moment I saw the was like seeing heaven on earth!! ..Alleluaia!! ..

The time is now exactly 7am.. poor dad was still in the car.. So I got in the bus..the moment I handed my 1 buck to the bus driver.. my phone started ringing.. it said, "Juan, the car can start already, come down the bus!! Hurrry!!" ...It was my dad, and those were his exact words!.. I was stunt!! ...Partially amazed, partially frustrated!!.. So I told my dad, "I paid the bus driver already.. if I ask back for my RM1..and get down the bus, he'll probably stick my face all over town saying "WANTED!! She's insane!!" ..Ok I didnt really say that..but I knew that would happen if I did get down the bus!

On the bus, I laughed.. I laughed literally.. Couldn't stop laughing.. Laughed and laughed. And this is not a joke! ..I mean what are the odds right... that the car would start exactly the moment I paid the bus driver.. exactly after 2 1/2 hours of waiting.. exactly after my sleep went away.. exactly after I bonded with my mom.. hmm.. like seriously.. I wooowwww??! How??! How come?? It just didnt make sense! hmm...I was soooo amazed I couldn't stop laughing.. I didnt know was I suppose to feel angry..but I was just filled with laughter at that moment..

I just looked up the sky.. and kept on laughing, silently saying, "Lord, You're funny. Really funny!!..thank you for this amazing feeling.." 

I didnt know why..or how... but well I think He was trying to tell me, "Take it easy my child..find some time for laughter and smiles.. they are the ones that will keep you going.."

Personality disorder..;p

Im' back!!! ...wooo hooo.. oh yes! ..I have loads to blog about.. unfortunately, its way pass my bedtime and I just completed my resume assignment. hehehehe..guess its back to staying-up-late-nite-cause-of-assignments hmm..

So I've been thinking, would someone actually like consider me for a position. I mean let's say if I join the career life.. to be honest. I have no idea on how to say stuffs about myself. I wrote "weird" in there..then I deleted cause I don't think anyone wants someone weird as their employee.. ..hmmm..after cracking my head for an hour so here's how I put it on my personality profile and it is suppose to be a whole page on this stuff...

Personality Profile:

I find this page the hardest page to write as I am still learning and have a lot more to learn about myself. As I have mentioned in my summary, I have quite an interesting personality. I tend to shy away in a large unknown crowd which confirms the obvious introvert person in me. At the same time, once I know the crowd, I tend to blossom and glow like a bright sunflower... ;p ;p 
I get along with almost everyone and can work very well in a team. I am more of a follower than a leader. However, given the task of leader, I can lead to the best of my abilities. I am more of a relationship oriented person rather than a task oriented person. I believe that once you have established a good relationship with your team mates then can the work be completed on time and successfully.
I dislike doing half past or incomplete work. Hence, I try to put my 101 % in everything I do. Once I am given a job and I am determined to put in my very best and produce a good piece of work. However, I have to say that I work best under pressure and I will meet the deadline even if I have to stay up all night.
I stand firm to the values of my life which are integrity, honesty, and sincerity. I appreciated everyone as they are for everyone is very special and unique in their own way. I do not agree in judging and criticizing others for I believe one should treat others as how they wish to be treated.
I can be easy to read and predictable or as complicated and unpredictable as a kaleidoscope. I see things as they are and try to connect them to life. I try not to complain much as I believe everything happens for a reason. I think life is a gift and I intend to use it wisely. In every fall, lies a chance for one stand up firmly. In every failure, lies an opportunity for one to succeed even more. In every loss, lies a greater mystery that is waiting to be revealed. will you buy it? ..Like will you consider to me as an employee in your company?? ..hmmm.. or was it too mushy and weird?? too informal?? .honestly, I'm still trying to figure what in the world is "personality" ..hmm.. do let me know if you knew what is it..sighh.. currently facing personality disorder..=S

Oh oh..and malacca post coming up! ..stay tuned!..heheh

Friday, January 14, 2011

You saved me

Heyy, its me again.. lol, yes who else could it possibly be?? ..hmmm my dead soul..which probably won't be coming back after this weekend. hehehe Ok I'm crapping again..;p

Anyway, its 8.35am in the morning..and I have a class at 9.30am. Hmm, what am I doing here so early? hehe.. my dearest, most adorable, awesome-est sister in the whole world decided to send me!!! ..weeeeeeeee!! But seriously I needed a lift. I can't be carrying my big black polo bag pack which is like twice my size in KTM station during the peak hours. I'll only be occupying so much space and well everyone must be wondering that I'm such a sad depressed child running away from home. Not to mention I look like a turtle with a "hard" shell on my back. And off all days I decided to wear green today.. hmmm. interesting..

Well, I actually have nothing to blog. Just wanted to kill time and since facebook is always getting aborted all the time meaning I can't check on my city ville or, if you have the extra time, or has got nothing else to do, do read these lyrics. It's a story about this guy about how he found a purpose in life.. I always wanted to post it, but never had a chance. But really, it touched me, might not be that effective for you, but well it wouldn't hurt much..=)

Oh oh, and I think R.Kelly has an amazing voice! ..=)

You saved me.

Verse 1
I was riding in my car one day
In the express lane rollin on the freeway
And suddenly the phone rings then I
Reached down beside me then i look
On the floor felt on the backseat
See I was drinking while I was driving
Never thinking bout what I was doing
I turned around and before i knew it
Here comes this truck now

Doctor said don't think he gonna make it
Family said make the funeral arrangements
Unplug the machine he's gone now
Then told my wife to be strong now
Then a small voice said told me
If you promise to stop drinking
I surrendered on that day
Now for ten years i've been straight

You saved me [4x]
Gave me a second chance
You saved me [3x]
You saved me

Verse 3
Now i've been sitting in this chair
Waiting on the phone to ring
Praying up to God that someone will call
Me with a job opening
Cause it's been so hard for me
Month to month struggling to eat
But still there was no answer
I stop believing in his word and
Got so mad at him and
When somebody said God's good
I just laugh at 'em

But in the nick of time his blessing
Rain on me
By his grace the phone ring
A lady said were hiring and
That's when I knew

You saved me [4x]

Verse 4
Now i was 18 out there on the block
Selling drugs
With a gun at my waist
And for people I had no love
See the streets was my home
Family and friends were all gone
Had no one to trust
And deep inside i was all alone
And a deal went bad one day
And it was enough to pause me
I was shot 4 times and before i
Knew it I was on my knees

Blood pushin out my body
My heart's beating faster don't know what i'm gonna do
I don't think i'm gonna last then
I begain to flash back on the things
I done in my past
Then I heard a small voice that said
I'll give you peace if you believe
I accepted Christ that day
Halilujah now i'm free

You saved me [4x]

Verse 6
I was in the aisle of the grocery store
With a pain in my chest and I'm wondering
Where did it come from (I got tested)
And the results came back
And the doctor said i'm sorry but u got cancer
I could not beleive it so
I call my mama to calm my nerves

(mama) she got down on her knees
(mama) she said a prayer for me
(mama) just keep on thanking Jesus
(mama) he'll give you what you need
(thank you Jesus)

Now that was five years ago
I don't have that pain no more
Doc said you can go home
Cause all your cancer's gone

You saved me [4x]

You saved me (said you saved me)
You saved me (but you saved me)
You saved me saaaved me
Gave me a second chance (second chance)
Halilujah saved me
Saved me saved me
Wooooooh You saved me

You gave me it was by grace You saved me
I'm so thankful that You looked down on me
Saw me standing there
I was at the end of my rope no where to go
And you gave me

No where to go (and you saved me)
I was down and out 2
I was doing drugs 2
I was running the streets 2
Never felt love
I was wilding out
You saved me
You stepped in ooh save me

You saved me

Yes pretty long song.. but well, incase you're wonering that God doesn't care or bother about you anymore. Well, just close your eyes and feel your heart beat. Jesus, has the same heart beat too. Only difference, his heart beat is you.

Till we meet again!

Nope I'm  not in a good mood right now..=(((

I'm leaving tomorrow.. like for real. =( .. I don't feel like going. sighhhh.. I don't know why, but I;m really really not in the mood to go. Not now at least.. SIGHHHHH!! ..But I don't have a choice! ..and NOOOOO!! I don't wanna go!! ..siighhhh.. SSIIIGHHHHHH!! ... why??  oh why Juan! ..What's wrong??! .. Goodness! ..If at all you know how I'm feeling right now.. sighhh.. I don't wanna go! .. And and.. I'm having this feeling that this is going to be the last.. like the last time EVER. Like I probably won't be meeting my family again.. or ever get to sleep on my bed.. or blog.. sheeessshh..

Yikkesss.. Great! ..Now I sound like one stuck-up "spoilt-brat" ...but really.. can someone save me? ..sighh..

What am I saying?!? ..its only 3 days 2 nights! ..and its MALACCA! ..not between life and death!.. and your going with your friends.. what else could be less exciting?? ..hmmm

I'm sorry, I needed something to come back to

So anyway..have to go back packing my stuffs.. and charging stuffs.. and listing and writting.. hmmm

Exciting huh, how life is?? ..You thought you had it all, but well, its just the beginning!

Lord, please keep my family safe while im away!..

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Poor child

"Maybe its intuition, somethings you just don't question.. Like in your eyes, I see my future in an instance.."

EXHAAUUSSTEDD!! .. like seriously.. I don't know how am I able to even post something.. But I got to say something! ..

"I know that it may sound more than a little..crazy but I believe... I knew I loved you before I met you.. I think I dreamed you into life.." 

Lol.. sorry, sorry.. the playlist is full with lovey-dovey songs.. and nope I'm not gonna say a word..hehe

Well, anyway, the truth is hehehe.. oklar..I'll be away this weekend. Nope, not johore, since I'm always cabut-ing there whenever I have the chance.. but well, this time its in Malacca!! ..For my true love awaits me there!! ..weeeeeeeeee!! Yes you read that correctly.. its "T-R-U-E L-O-V-E" ..hehehe..damm cekap rite?? lol

But, even if heaven freezes over hell..we all know thats impossible. LOL.. yes, I'll be in Malacca, not because of my so-called true love, but because I'm on an assignment trip! ..uh huh, my assignment includes travelling! Oh yeap, I love my course too! ..We get to go away with your team mates on a trip!! XD

We'll be leaving this Friday, and be back on Sunday.. so yeah..the dear blog will be a bit sad without me, so please do visit him all the time k? ..;p

And for the more serious part..sometimes I wonder:

  • Why is "holding on" ..harder than "letting go" ..?? .. hmm disagree? ..try holding a full water bottle..and letting go.. you will get what I;m trying to say..=)
  • How you know when one is telling the truth..?
  • So if it breaks every single wall you built and rule you wrote.. what do you do?
  • Why do I feel like I'm the only human in this world.. who thinks that everything is wrong with "LOVE" that the world portray nowadays?
  • hmm.. why is it always the one who has got no what so ever intention towards others..that ends up with the word "MESSED" and "COMPLICATED" ...
  • What do you do.. when theres nothing else you can do?
  • And its the heart versus the head again.. =(
Sighh.. I think I should just follow my stomach this time. HMM..chocolates, where are you, when I need you, now?!!

Note to self:
Juan Margrita, what in the world were you thinking?? ... You actually thought that its... grrrr.. nevermind! ..I reminded you. But you never even bothered. And not here you go again! ..When are you going to learn?? sigh,,, Poor child!

OHH..and this was written when she was completely delusional and exhausted. No questions should be asked. Thank you!

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Because love takes time..

"Said, I promise to never fall in love, with a stranger, you're all I'm thinking off.. I praise the Lord above.."

Weird. Yes I probably mentioned this word like about 2000 times already in this blog, but that's how I'm feeling.. weird.. Really, I don't understand how this world works anymore. Everything is just so plain weird. Like really weird.

Everything is like so damm fast. Yes, time waits for no one. But the world is going in an unimaginable speed. Especially technology. You barely have time to breathe or say hello to each other because everyone is so caught up in their own world.

But then again, like what's the point of swallowing immediately the delicious chocolate indulgence when you cant savour the taste?.. What's the point of getting great results, when you actually cheated to get the results? .. hmm.. I don't know how else to explain it. Its like skipping a whole step. I mean nothing wrong in getting a short cut, but you want to make it worth, right?..Like all the struggle is finally paid off. Like you want to look at something and say, "Wow, I work hard for it!!" .. Like its worth the wait..

And the "udang" di sebalik "batu" is well about relationships.. hehehe.. I found this in tumblr that says, "don't fall in love when your lonely, fall in love when you're ready.." ..Which I totally agree.. Because if you want to be with someone, only because they're there..and they whisper words you needed to hear badly.. then its not call "love".. Nope, its far from love. I'm not really sure what love is.. but I'm pretty clear of what "using" is..

Seriously, if you want it to work out with that very person.. take your time then.. Get to know that person. Laugh, cry, hug, smile, get mad, get crazy together. Because before the love is visible, the friendship must be built. Like in the Jason Mraz song.. LUCKY..."I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend" .. And to fall in love with your very best friend, is something very beautiful.. because no one knows you better than your best friend, himself. =)

God has his own ways of making things possible. One thing's for sure, He knows what's best.. He knows what's right. He knows you, He knows what you want. And if you say a little prayer each day.. trust me, we all can create miracle! If its meant to be.. it will.. or else.. He has something better for you in story!

Don't loose faith.. =)
For He did not promise that life would be easy..but He did promise to be with you in every step you take!

Monday, January 10, 2011

A whole new world

Ahemm!! eheheh.. bare with me today, I'm in such a good mood, though its a Monday, though its beginning of the week... why? well, it happens once in a when you start smilling for no reason..;p hehehe so don't mind the extra crappings..

Anyway, KTM has been unusually efficient the whole week! ..I was so shocked and amazed, that I kept on repeating it.. And Sudha and Sam told me to not "jinx" it.. hehehe.. well, if it all KTM's service starts to go down the drain.. hmmm, its not my fault.. really..=)  it must be someone else..;p ...for my words are worth much more than for "jinx-ing" .only.. heheheh.. ;p well, "its only words, and words are all I have to take your heart away.." Although those are from beegees.. but I totally agree!!..

Ok, I didn't know what was I trying to prove.. anyway, lets move on..

I was listening to "a whole new world" from ALADDIN...and the picture of aladdin and princess Jasmine on the magic carpet.. came to my mind. And I wondered.. how nice, if we all had a magic carpet! ..I mean, it's not only faster, we can also escape traffic! ..and well, the chances of you getting hit by a lightning is higher..but gosh, we will be on air!! With the clouds, with the birds, with the wind, closer to heaven *literally and not literally* ..probably touch the stars.. hmmm! ..I think its lovely!! though its a lil too over-ambitious, and off-reality.. but well, we could save lifes with magic carpets, you know..=) hehehe.. *i didnt warn you about the extra crappings* ..;p

And speaking of "ALADDIN" ...I think its the second best fairy-tale on my list! ..The first of cause, goes to beauty and beast.. hehe.. But seriously, if you think about it.. Jasmine didn't fall in love the so-called prince, Aladdin pretended to be.. or his money..or what-so-ever.. She liked the thief. The real person, the one without the mask. Because she looked beyond his eyes.. She loved his heart..  Simply beautiful. I mean yes, the genie, magic carpet, and the villain is pure fairy tale, but if you look at the underlying meaning.. I think its brilliant eh..=)

hmmm.. Yes I know, I live in another world. And that's pass my age to talk about FAIRY TALES.. but hello, one should dare to be different. Dare to stand up for what you believe in, though the world thinks otherwise.. well because its easier to follow the current than to fight against the wave. It requires extra courage, extra boldness, extra strength. Hence, everyone prefers the easy way out. hmmm..

And so back to "a whole new world.." ...simply amazing and breathtaking lyrics..

I can show you the world.
Shining.. shimmering.. splendid..
Tell me princess now, when did you last let your heart decide.

I can open your eyes.
Take you wonder by wonder.
Over sideways and under, on a magic carpet ride.

A whole new world.
A new fantastic point of view.
No one to tell us no 
Or where to go 
Or say we're only dreaming.

A whole new world.
A dazzling place I never knew..
But now from way up here
It's crystal clear that now I'm in a whole new world with you..

Unbelievable sights. .
Indescribable feeling.. 
Soaring, tumbling, free-wheeling.
Through an endless diamond sky.

A whole new world.
Don't you dare close your eyes.
A hundred thousand things to see.
Hold your breath, it gets better.
I'm like a shooting star.
I've come so far.
I can't go back to where I used to be. 

A whole new world.
With new horizons to pursue.
I'll chase them anywhere, there's time to spare.
Let me share, this whole new world with you.

A whole new world.
That's where we'll be
A thrilling chase.
A wondrous place.
For you

Really, I think its a beautiful song.. And "tell me princess now when did you last let your heart decide?" ..hmm.. I'm not a princess, but well I quit trusting my heart for a while already, and nope, I'm not ready to let it decide again..:-(

Ok I've had enough for today..

And Lord, please let KTM come again on TIME, every single day..=)

Sunday, January 9, 2011

Can't find a title


heheheeh.. I suddenly feel like smilling..=)))) ..and if you feel the same, smileeeee!! ..=)))) ;p ;p

hmmmm..I wanted to post about something, unfortunately it slipped out of my mind.. I'll let you know once I regain my memory k?! =)

Oh and I have the bestest sister in the whole wide world!! ...hehehe.. for now..;p ;p ..Because she actually got me the bluetooth device which means now its so much easier for me to transfer stuffs into/from my oh-so-lovely pink mobile!! ..hehehe..;p She's definitely not gonna read this.. but someday when I'm 50 and read this back.. I shall remember my-once-in-a-blue-moon-AWESOME-sis!! ..hehehe ;p

Hmm, what else... oh yeah, first day of catechism class today.. New students, new environment.. Almost lost my voice while trying to calm them down.. Apparently everyone is so excited at the beginning..but by the end of the year, they just can't wait to get over it.. hmmm, the same goes with new things.. it'll be soo cool to hold it in your hands..and after a few days/months.. the value drops.. we don't feel that excited anymore.. sometimes we even forget that it exist.. Hmm.. could it be the same with people? .. hmm I guess not, or else it matrimony wouldn't mean a thing. =)

Alrite, sorry for the not so interesting post, my mom was determined to ruined my kinda-awesome day..=)

Have a great nite!!

oh and I simply can't get this off my mind..

"When you smile, the whole world stops and stares for a while.. cause you're amazing, just they way you are.."

Friday, January 7, 2011

600 minutes to class..;p

And UCSI is up to its nonsense again!! ..grrrrr!! ....Our Friday Marketing class is now scheduled to SATURDAY!! ...grrrrr!! ..It was all so perfect! ..I even liked my timetable.. but now its in a mess!... sighhhh.. how now? ...continue or drop?!

Hmmmm... and its a Saturday.. all the weddings and movies..and dates!! ..S-A-T-U-R-D-A-Y!!! ....bllluueekk!! ..

So the extra time to blog.. and well I have another 10 mins before class starts.. And after that I have a movie date with stal and cynta!! ..weeeeeeeee!! finally la.. and one more thing.. Crystal is going to KAMPAR! ..shheeeshh.. Cynta going back to SP! ..and I'm here alone.. hmm.. why wasn't I destined to go some where far too.. like away from home.. At least I get to meet people, be independent, learn life, find love.. rather than being stuck in Kajang.. I mean, Kajang is like probably the best part of the world you can ever be.. but sometimes..too much of KAJANG can drive you crazy.. Ok I don't know what am I saying..
And I think I should go's gonna take me like 600 minutes to get to my class.. lol..have you ever been to UCSI? .. trust me, it is 600 minutes! ..Go up the mountain, find your class, walk through the crowd.. check out some people.. look at the mirror.. 600 minutes people!
Yikes, there comes the crapping!..Alrite! my time is up..

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

He can move the mountains

Today, I was angry. I've never felt such anger in my life. I was so angry, I felt like screaming and cursing. But of cause, if at all I did, the passer by in Kajang would called the HOSPITAL BAHAGIA the next minute. Yes, it was that bad and I could almost feel smoke coming out of my ears.

Why was I angry? Let's leave that aside. Who was I angry with?.. Let's leave that aside too. Was it alright for me to be angry? ..I don't know. But if you knew me at all, I'm the type who can control my anger and I don't get angry that fast. So what did I do when I got angry, out of the blues?? The feeling was too much. I could feel my chest almost bursting together with the blood, bones, flesh and muscles. But of cause, that only happens in my stead the "bursting" part came out in tears. I cried on the mini bus, on the train and on UCSI Shuttle. Yes, I tried to control it. Even try to no blink my eyes but it only made it even worse. I was like a leaking water balloon! A few people were sneaking a sneak preview when I wiped my noes with the tissue. It was kinda embarrassing..but thank goodness the hair was kinda long..and I could cover half of my face. hmmm

I didn't know why was I angry.. but I knew I was missing out something so very unusual. I was running late for really late and coincidently, my play list played the song, "Mighty to save" by Hillsong ...It said,

"Saviour, He can move the mountains,
My God is mighty to save..
He is mighty to save.."

And a line appeared on my mind.. "If He can  move mountains, why can't He bring you on time for class??" ...
And then I realized though I waited 60 minutes for the mini bus..and missed my usual 9.42am train.. The next train came exactly on time..and it wasn't even a minute late.. Surprisingly, KTM had been very kind to me these pass few days.. And the moment I reached BTS station, UCSI shuttle was right in front of me.. and I was 10 minutes early for  my class!! ...

I was amazed.. and I felt this weird calmness in me. It conquered my whole anger..and I begin to smile, thinking how foolish was I to put everything else first, including my anger.. but He seemed to be last person on my mind. He seemed to be the last person, I surrender too.. the last person I ask for help.. the last person I run too..

And the second verse of this song hit me too..

So take me as you find me..
All my fears and failure
Fill my life again..

I give my life to follow..
Everything I believe in.
Now I surrender..

Weird how God works huh? ..He puts you in such a the edge of everything you have.. He tests you to the max! ..Giving up and start doubting.. And then He lets to smile again, like nothing ever happen!..

Lord, you amazed me, every single day!

Perfect for me! ..;p

Aheemm!! ...heheheheeh.. so how's 3rd of January??! I should say it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.. besides the part where I accidently kicked my own shoe while getting up the bus..and the cute curly head guy had to be right behind me..helping me find my shoe while the whole UCSI was behind us, watching the whole drama in the rain!!..SIGHHHH.. yeshh.. If I had the money I would have gone for a plastic surgery..but for now, we'll just hope to NOT bump into him again..

Today..hmm.. today was rather normal.. As usual, my name was the centre of attention.. Mr Ken was with his stand as usual.."Juan is A GUY's Name" I don't blame him though.. the name is such.. hmmm..and Mr Philip was wondering if I am "drinkable" ..or but I kinda love the lectures for this sem..=)

And I'm taking this subject called "Intro to IT" ..guess what was our first to create a blog in WORDPRESS?!! ..and start posting! ..I was like, "are you serious,??!!" ..hehe so yesh, here's my other blog..

What else??! ..Had some girl to girl with the girls.. and this is what I learned.. that whatever you do, always protect your heart.. and that do not give anyone the authority to break it..

So I looked at my fingers..and the spaces in between..wondering why is it still empty. hehehe.. And yeah, guys can be so weird, like one minute, they make you feel on top of the mountain..the next, they pretend you don't exist! ..Like a kit-kat, now you see, now you don't..;p ;p..

Co-incidently..i came across this..from tumblr..

Who wants the perfect guy?
Not me. I don’t want anyone perfect. I don’t want anyone normal, thats just boring. I want someone weird. I want someone unpredictable. I want someone who lets things slide and who loves to laugh and makes me laugh. I want someone who will be crazy about me, and isn’t afraid to let everyone know it. I want him to be able to tell me to shut the hell up when I am bugging him. I want someone who challenges me, in every way. I want someone who puts up with my shit, but isnt a pushover. I want someone who pisses me off, but I can never be mad at. But perfect? That’s one thing I never want. Maybe just perfect for me.

Lol, thats like sooo perfect! ..hehhehe;p ;p...

Well anyway my sister told this to the English Youth Committee when we had our Christmas.. "My sister, Juan lives in another world. She waits for her knight in shinning armour!" ..hahahahahahah.. Oh yes, and I do and I admit it! because deep down, everybody is awaiting someone..some where.. but then they fail to realize, people come, people go.. but Jesus is the one man who never left his girl! Amen!

Monday, January 3, 2011

3rd of January 2011

Yes, its 3rd of January..
The day where the sun stopped shinning and darkness covered the whole earth..
The day where there's no way I could get up after the sun-rises..
The day where I had to abandon my CITY in Facebook till its late night again..
The day where I'll start cursing KTM all over again..
The day where I have to wait forever for the MINI BUS and UCSI's SHUTTLE..
The day where I wished I could actually stay awake for at least ONE lecture..;p
The day where I'll complaining non-stop about assignments, assignments and ASSIGNMENTS! ..
The day where well...I get back to college..sigh..

And on the other hand..

The day where I actually have SOMETHING to do..
The day where I get to meet some AWESOME people!
The day where..I most probably get to loose some weight..
The day where I gain experience..
The day where I learn what life is about..
The day which wouldn't happen again..ever..
The day which I dread.. but hopes for the best!

Lol..sorry for the drama.. but well, yes I do realize this blog is dying.. and that I needed to do something about it..hence the tiny drama about 3rd of Jan!! And yes its just I'VE BEEN REALLY EXTREMELY BUZY! Jokes aside!! ..barely have time to rest!! ..grrr.. but well I do have some stories.. which I hope to jot it down here sometime soon!!

Meanwhile, Lord, I leave my tomorrow unto thy Hands! ..Amen!

And just for the record this is my 548TH post! ..hehehe