Trapped...

the sky seem so high..
the sea seem so deep..
no matter how high i jump..
or how deep i swim..
i can't reach them..

i tried my best..
to do a lot of things..
to win their hearts..but
it's like i don't exist..

i did not wish to be born..
you left me no choice..

i look at them..
they have all they want..
smiles after smiles..
laughter after laughter..

i wonder..
are they really happy??
how come it seems so easy..for them..
but so darn hard for me??

maybe i am..
just another weird girl..
'blur' seems much better..

happiness..
crawls in..beneath those shadows..
but it disappears..
as soon as i open my eyes..

joy..
a strange word..
i may or may not..
find the real meaning..

hope..
a word i hold on to..
but i'm tired..
for the muscles..
are wearing..

love...
so easily it's pronounced..
so deep the meaning it carries..
i don't think..
i'm worth to even say it..
what more..find out the meaning..

i stretch out..now..
to find a hand..
that's willing to carry me..
a heart..that can love me..
at my worst..

that's what i guessed..
nobody..
besides you..LORD!
AMEN!!..