Tuesday, November 24, 2009

In giving that we receive

Blessed evening dear bloggers!!..and blog readers!!..=)

I did it!!..hehe..I conducted praise and worship..for the first time!!..I didnt really care how was it!!..all I know..was..I DID IT!!..

hehe..so let me testify..for the one who MADE me do it!!

Let me start from the back k..

When I was done..I went to my seat and told the Lord.."I screwed it up..didnt I, Lord??" and seriously..this was what i saw.."I saw Him..smiling widely..kissing my forehead..saying.."I'm proud of you!!" ..gosh.. I started shivering..almost to tears..saying.."Thank You Lord.." ..and I didnt care how it went..

And after that..uncle Edwin David..the prayer group team.."We have heard of the 'anointed one'..for the Lord has worked POWERFULLY..through this YOUNG lady over hear.." ..

To be honest..I knew I got lost the bridge part of our father.."like how in the world did this go??" ..and there was like a long pause..i so wanted to disappear..*ask glynn*..she also very blurr..oh yeah..THANK YOU GLYNN WONG KAR KAY...for handling the overhead projector for me..=) ..ohh aNd HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLYNN!!!!

Anyway back to my story.. I mentioned in my previous post that I was broken wasn't I??..and that surely I'll break down..somewhere during worship..well.. I did1!.. During the song.."I will sing" by Don moen.. words just came out like fountain.. non-stop.. and It felt so good..I didn;t wanna stop..then I felt my voice cracking..and I was like.."oh-oh.." ..not now.. I mean I didnt want to drown in my tears..there..in front of all..at least not now lar..

thank God I manage to control..

Then came to OUR FATHER song..I totally forgot how to sing the bridge part..sigh..so thats why I though I screwed it up..but like I said..I didnt care..

And after everything ended..Surprisingly..aunty Mary came and congratulated me..and wondered if I wanna do it again..and I said.."WHY NOT??!!" ..

And then Pam..came and said.."Juan, you almost brought me to tears..that was really good!!" ..

I told her.."I was in tears already..=)".. and I realized..that.. If I didn't hurt..as much as I hurt before.. I wouldn't be able..to say the things I said..or did.. Or touched someone.. indirectly.. through my healing..

And todays bible sharing was so appropriated.. IN GIVING WE RECEIVE!! i mean..i didnt have much to give..just my voice..and the broken heart..still I gave Him all..I shared His love..to many.. hoping at least one..will receive it with open arms.. =)..and guess what I got back in return??...a utmost and unconditional love sealed with calmness..and unending joy in my heart.. you think I'm crapping??..hehe.. why then..am I still awake..at 2.45am..trying to put in words..what HE has done to me??..

Lost Hope??..or wanna give up..well..take a look at this..

Prayer of St Francis of Asisi

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace
Where there is hatred, let me sow love
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
where there is sadness, joy;

O Divine Master,
grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood as to understand;
to be loved as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive;
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life..

good nite..and god bless..

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